Difference

There is something about differences in people- it can be good or it can be very bad.
I guess there is always some kind of "compromising" that must be done in a relationship
but I strongly believe in changing the BARE minimum.

To love someone's flaws perfectly.
man, its so rare to find that kind of love.
I know i'm not hopeless when it comes to that, but I sure feel.. far from it.

Yes, I always rave about my boyfriend being so great, and don't get me wrong, he is amazing!
He's amazing in a lot of aspects,
but taking a closer look..
he seems like the perfect guy from afar,
the details of our relationship however don't seem to add up to me.
No matter how much I try to squish the pieces together,
I can't seem to fit them..
Something feels off
something feels wrong..
and my heart can't help but..
drift

I can't seem to really find what's wrong.. but I'm thinking
there just doesn't seem to be enough passion-
this Passion or fire that I see in perfect couples..
its there.. in the smallest way..
but its not there for me..
I'm so stagnant in this relationship,
not drowning nor growing from it,
and I don't think feeling this way is healthy.

Why is it so hard to find a guy that is CRAZY about me..
I no longer blame the guy,
I think maybe there is just something wrong with me..
Not that i'm a horrible person, but just that..
I'm just not capable of love.. at least not the love that exist in this world.

I'm happy by myself.. and always have been.. maybe I'm suppose to stay that way forever..
who knows..
I am no longer looking in the future.. cuz my path is constantly changing .. leading me to a whole new place..
I no longer trust my heart