Relationships

Sometimes I hate being an a relationship..

not to say i'm not happy

but why do all relationships come with drama.. seriously, I don't know a single relationship that has not fought. Although it's inevitable, sometimes I think its so unnessary in my life. -_-

As a single girl, you can gather yourself, better yourself, and focus on your personal goals.

As a girl in a relationship, you have to constantly think of the other person, worry, stress, wonder if they still feel the same way or if their feelings faded, jealousy becomes an issue, they look and compliment other girls, we all look at other people and wonder if they are "better".. ahh this is all so sad.. I HATE IT..

I never wanted to be that girl, I never wanted to change who I was.. especially not like the way I have been. Its something I can't control either.. I feel like I becoming this psychotic paranoid girlfriend.. and I HATE girls like that..

What I need to work on.. is to not let things get to me.. I need to be more apathetic with everything.. but HOW? howwwww? Ideally, I think its best if the guy is constantly reassuring.. but they never are.. they are sort of lazy in this area.. lol.

sigh. I wonder if I'm just a weak person?I'm crazy observant, and I think over time I have seen many guys in relationships that have these googly eyes and hit on other girls despite having a girlfriend.. and I have seen too many to COUNT! I just never want to be one of those girls that gets screwed over with her heart.. I try to be on my guard.. but letting these small things get to me I know.. is a sign of weakness.

Relationships are hard.. communication is key.. independence and being strong minded is the answer to my problem. I really do miss who I was. Relationships can bring out the worse in people.. no matter how wonderful.

AH, I need a break from myself..