Lonely

Hm, for the past couple weeks, I couldn't help but feel the sense that I was alone in this world. I questioned if people really cared about other people, or if they were just using you...

I want those types of friendships you see in the movies- the ones where they have EVERYTHING in common, they are strong together, they are in sync, and they are there for each other NO MATTER what. ON top of all that, they are willing to do crazy things together so they can keep their friendship exciting.

Friendship is very similar to a relationship, and it really matters to keep in contact regularly...But often times, we do our own thing, and don't really have much concern OR time for anyone else in our lives.

Sigh, I guess this is called depression. I seriously feel it.

If you think about it no one is really there for me..

my boyfriend is either working a lot or gone somewhere, feels like we are living totally separate lives-

My sister- who can't DO anything anymore cuz she has two kids

My parents- are so lazy- they only like staying home to watch tv

My best friend- who is SO busy with internship, job, school, boyfriend- I'm afraid to intrude.

Others- DON"T have time to hear ur problems; or why WOULD I even want to burden them with my life?

So who really is there? Myself. Thus, I am lonely. I feel alone, and that makes me sad. Sigh. No matter where I go, I suppose I will always be alone.

Home Remedies

New Discoveries:

Vinegar Soak: Wanna get rid of scab quick? Wanna heal faster than normal without a scar? Did you pick at that pimple, and u need to heal? Well, this home ingredient can do all that! Usually wounds heal about 7- 14 days, but this vinegar soak can help you heal in 3-5 days! What to do? Put 1 tsp of WHITE VINEGAR with 2 CUPS of WATER together to make your solution- use a gauze or cotton ball to place over (NOT RUB) and keep it on for about 10 min. After that put on the e- solve ointment or any healing ointment. Its seriously a miracle healer :D

Aspirin + Honey mask- See a zit coming on you face? Stop it in its TRACK before it becomes a full on ZIT. YUP. It seriously works! How? aspirin has natural salicylic acid + honey has natural healing power that reduces swelling and redness! So together if you make a mask- place over problem area and sleep with it on. The next day- it should all be GONE. I usually place 2 big aspirins into a tiny bit of water ( make it super saturated so that the solute is greater than the solvent) and add a couple drops of honey- mix together till it makes a thick mask and place on- don't rub this in either. (technique: aspirin is really hard to break apart, so if you leave it in a droplet of water it'll break apart on its own, that way after a couple of hours you can add all the other stuff and just mix.

yay! enjoy ur CLEAR face :D

Earth Day

I learn something new everyday on how to treat this world a little better. I definitely used to take it for granted because EVERYONE already screwed it up anyways- but I guess this movement of helping the world be more eco- friendly starts with a single person.

I can definitely respect the way JOSIE MARAN- lives. She used to be one of my favorite models- I just love her classic hippie/ girl next door look. Her few pointers: put a BRICK inside ur toilet, raises the water- so it uses less every time you flush, use biodegradable products as fertilizer, turn off all electrical outlets (phone charger, computer charger)- saves you $90 a yr, she uses vodka to take out odor from your clothes.. so you can do laundry less often, interesting huh?

I should try all these- I like the way she lives.. she gave a tour of her home, its neat. Oh yea and she NEVER uses paper napkins- only cloth because its reusable and reduces trash.

k, Happy Earth DAY :D!!!

Product review

Sigh. I love sephora.. don't you?

anyways, I go there enough times to accumulate massive amount of points.. which ALLOWED me to receive a free gift every time! I'm trying out new things and taking home samples of anything I like. Anyways new discoveries:

1) "philosophy" amazing grace lotion

It is AMAZINGGGGGGG~. The scent is so subtle but STRONG.. and sort of addicting.. almost like clean laundry smell lol.. but I FOR SURE will be purchasing it in the FUTURE.. the whole tub. (its also anti- aging) :D

2) Not a big fan of "Korres lip balm" - dries up so fast

3)I want "inFatuation" lip gloss- big and bare. It really makes ur lips look fuller with good gloss not the sticky kind.

4) Clinique- milk cleanser- take the day off soap. I was pretty lazy when it comes taking off my makeup. With the two steps, eye first, then cloth to remove the face- ugh.. so I wanted something gentle and moisturizing that can do it all at once- I looked everywhere, everything else is oily or creamy, or petroleum- esque, meh.. but this is so light and really dissolves all makeup.

Vinegar- skin care? to be continued.

Decisions, Decisions

So today, I made an important phone call to Wagner College- one of the most beautiful schools in Staten Island, NY. See the reason I made this phone call is because I was conflicted in my career choice to either become an occupational therapist or a physician assistant.

The reason I question my career route is because all my life I have been adamant about healing people through internal medicine. Who knew I would fall into the route of treating patients thru external, physical healing. I kept asking myself, is that what I want to do for the rest of my life, and will I be happy doing it? I really thought to myself that "No, Sharon you need to focus on internal medicine" but heading to the PA route is a little more strenuous. How so? Well, if you know me, you know that the only science I absolutely HATE with a passion is CHEMISTRY. I can handle physics, biology, anatomy, and physiology.. but PA pre- reqs are all about CHEM, OCHEM, BIOCHEM.. you see the problem here? If I am unable to handle or I think i'm unable to handle those classes, maybe internal medicine really isn't the right path for me. I keep thinking about my competitors and people just like me heading in that direction, and HOW much better they are than I AM. They know the ins and outs of chemistry and can absorb the material just like that. *sigh* Thoughts like that make me REALISTIC and I need to learn how to accept my strength and weaknesses.

Therefore, I created a roadmap today in my room. I plastered on paper all over my wall so I can create this elaborate plan. What did I do? I listed my three options: 1) PA 2) OT 3) Dietician

then I mapped out how I would get into those schools. PA requiring about 8 more science classes, OT 3 more left, and Dietician- 8 more. I automatically crossed out dietician just because a PA consists of knowing the way the body works in any circumstance and if I'm going to take the same amount of pre- reqs I might as well head towards a PA route. Ok next was to look at my options between OT and PA. PA route consists of having 1000 hrs of WORK with direct patient care, 8 additional science classes- most of them being chemistry related, and third work with an actual physician assistant. ALL WHICH I LACK making me lose another 2 yrs of NOT being in school. It seems like PA had a lot more CONs than PROs. But then I was left with OT- yes, if I don't tell you why I kept it on the list then it will surely look like I have settled which is not the case. The reason I feel like OT may be the best path for me is because 1) I only have 2 more classes to take, 2) I work directly with an occupational therapist 3) I'll be able to apply this year 4) I will be able to utilize 2011 with becoming an EMT or taking additional classes of my choice- like graphic design etc. 5) because although from the outside.. OT looks like it is focused on ONLY physical healing- they actually need to know a lot about internal medicine in order to TREAT patients properly (with little chemistry involved, lol). All in all, OT really is holistic- but I just never saw it that way before. Phew so hopefully I have made the correct... and FINAL decision. All in all, I think I will try to apply to Wagner's PA program where they will help me finish my pre- reqs. Something I can think about- although they told me its super competitive for people with bachelors. Hm..

So there it is.. I'm going to stay focused and ON TRACK!

My diet

I've realized all my blogs are about- Skin care, career choices, and diet plans. I think these three subjects consume my every thought and being.

I'm usually really good about the types of food I consume, but I think the past two weeks, I've really let myself go. I mean I know that indulging in sweets and what not is NOT awful if consumed in the right portions but I REALLY let myself go... and to top it off the guilt and.. results .. Let's just say I'm paying for my mistakes. lol.

Ok well it is never too late to start a good diet plan especially when you're young. And this diet plan isn't to make you SUPER skinny or anything- but the key word here being "healthy"! If you're healthy- you will automatically maintain a good weight and a lot more energy! Usually it takes me 2 days of detox to make me feel on track again- then a normal healthy diet begins.

what to do on a daily basis with your eating habits:

1) stay away from fried foods

2) Eat a wholesome breakfast- eggs, fruit smoothie, green tea, rice + side dishes, etc.

3) snack away in between meals- but on fruits or veggies- STAY AWAY FROM CHIPS and SODA .. (popcorn is actually a good alternative)

4) eat slowly- makes you full faster

5) share your meal with a friend.. I bought a box of full of pumpkin white chocolate chip cookies and.. if i hid them in my room, I know I would have eaten away at all of them.. leaving me 20 pounds heavier.. but that never happens because I leave my food in the kitchen, where my rat dad comes and devours 99.9% of it... leaving me with no choice but to only EAT one itty bitty cookie. Outside I become angry, but inside I'm secretly thankful lol.

6) I'm trying to stay away from DAIRY products- no bueno for my digestive system.

7) Try not to eat past 8:00 pm...

8) Don't eat then sleep right away, a dietician has told me, you can gain 5 lbs in an instant.

9) Sleep 8- 9 hrs a day. let your body heal.

10) Try to stay active during the day.. take the long way .. walk here and there... doing small active stuff like that makes u lose body fat... strenuous workouts actually make you KEEP body fat but build muscle.. interesting huh?

11) good luck to you and to me. :D Let's stay on track.

Product Review

So there have been many MANY trial and errors.. but overtime I have accumulated some of my fave products. Here is the list:

1) L'occitane Hand Lotion- I'm a huge advocate of shea butter. I feel like its the only thing that helps with dryness immediately. --also any body soap that has shea butter.. I like also. :D

2) Kiehl's Lip gloss- I got the MANGO flavor one.. but I must say this really is the #1 lip balm. Helps soothe ALL lip problemos seriously. Burts bees couldn't even do the job of replenishing my UBER dry lips.

3) Kid's listerine- strawberry flavor- so funnn! It colors all ur plaque and junk pink when u spit it out and it taste good. Makes you want to rinse ur mouth often!

4) Kid's gummi vitamins- Yes.. I have fallen into the pattern of acting like a kid with all these kid stuff.. but seriously.. if they make it yummy and fun for kids.. its fun for me! OMG- vitamins are so crucial to your HEALTH. Working at the nursing home- I can't help but realize that many of their problems and injuries could have been prevented with VITAMINS. Take it while you're young.. especially the calcium gummies! WOMEN.. you guys lose a lot of bone tissue as you age.. you need to take calcium NOW... and MILK does not cut it!

right now I am testing out two eye creams.. can't tell which one I like so far but will update soon :D

1) bliss- all around eye cream

2) Korres- evening primrose (I think i'm leaning towards this one, but we'll see)

I wish I knew everyones "can't live without list"

Talent

They say that EVERYONE possesses a talent. No matter what it is, we all have something that is a strength and some stuff that show our weakness. But aside from that, I have been on a crazy journey looking for what my TALENT could possibly be. le sigh.

Sadly, I have always felt like an average joe. Can't really exceed at anything I do. I can probably memorize something quickly.. but that's about it. It sounds sad in itself. lol. Ah, how envious I am of singers, writers, artist, etc. People that utilize their skills.

But then I realized.. what if I do have a talent but I just don't like it? That maybe without utilizing that talent.. I've completely made it void? I mean someone can be an amazing singer but hate singing. Other people who are geniuses and can find the cure for cancer probably aren't using their talented brains to do that because they would rather become pro skaters. Have you ever thought about that? Maybe I'm one of those people that just doesn't like the talent that I don't know that I have that I may have.. if you get what I mean..

I don't know. Sometimes I feel like the more I'm surrounded by people that know exactly who they are and what they want to do- I become more LOST because I try to be someone I'm not. I easily become inept.

What is up with this 22 yr old stage- being lost.

Why do I want to stand out and be more than just average.. I seriously wish I was content with just being average.. it would make my life a lot easier.